Seeking God vs. Knowing God
"I believed in God but I wasn't a believer. I was no Christian."
When my friend Robia Scott said these words, describing her life during her years as a professional dancer and actress, I had to pause. Here was someone who believed in God, who had faith, who even had what she called "a spiritual life." But she wasn't a Christian. She didn't know Him.
And that distinction made all the difference.
This is one of the most critical truths I can share with you: having faith in God and having a relationship with God are two completely different things. Being spiritual and being Christian are worlds apart. And seeking God is not the same as knowing Him.
Let me explain what I mean.
The Seeker Who Hasn't Found
Robia described herself as "a seeker type of personality" who was "passionate about authenticity and congruency and alignment." She sensed that if she could connect with God in a real way, it should affect the areas of her life where she was struggling. She should have some peace.
But she didn't.
She had faith. She had a spiritual life. She even believed in God. But she was still tormented—uncomfortable in her own skin, anxious, battling eating disorders, chain smoking, looking for love in all the wrong places.
Why? Because she was seeking without finding. She was spiritual without being connected. She believed in God without knowing Him personally.
And you can't experience transformation through a God you believe in from a distance. You can only be changed by a God you know intimately.
The Difference Between Religion and Relationship
Let me be really clear about something: Christianity is not a religion. It's a relationship.
I know that might sound like a cliché, but it's profoundly true. And the distinction between religion and relationship explains why some people who believe in God never experience His transforming power in their lives.
Religion is about:
Following rules
Performing rituals
Maintaining appearances
Earning approval
Keeping your distance while showing respect
Relationship is about:
Authentic connection
Open communication
Mutual love and trust
Receiving grace freely
Intimate knowledge of each other
Religion keeps God at arm's length. Relationship brings Him close.
Religion says, "I believe God exists and I should obey Him." Relationship says, "I know God personally and I love Him."
That's a massive difference.
Jesus Himself addressed this distinction. He said, "Not everyone who says to Me, 'Lord, Lord,' shall enter the kingdom of heaven, but he who does the will of My Father in heaven. Many will say to Me in that day, 'Lord, Lord, have we not prophesied in Your name, cast out demons in Your name, and done many wonders in Your name?' And then I will declare to them, 'I never knew you; depart from Me, you who practice lawlessness!'" (Matthew 7:21-23, NKJV).
Notice: these people were religious. They prophesied, cast out demons, did wonders—all in Jesus' name. But Jesus said, "I never knew you."
They had religion without relationship. They had spiritual activity without authentic connection. And it made all the difference.
When Spiritual Doesn't Equal Christian
In our culture today, many people identify as "spiritual but not religious." They might practice yoga, meditation, mindfulness. They might believe in a higher power, pursue enlightenment, seek to align their chakras.
None of these things make someone a Christian.
Being spiritual means acknowledging that there's more to reality than just the physical world. It means being open to transcendent experiences and seeking meaning beyond materialism.
Being a Christian means having a personal relationship with Jesus Christ through Holy Spirit. It means being born again, transformed from the inside out, brought into intimate connection with the living God.
You can be deeply spiritual without being Christian at all. Robia was. She had faith, she had a spiritual life, she believed in God—but she wasn't a Christian. She didn't know Him.
And here's what she discovered: all that spiritual seeking couldn't give her what she really needed. It couldn't quiet the torment, couldn't break the bondage, couldn't bring her into peace.
Only knowing God personally could do that.
The Hunger for Authenticity
One thing Robia said really struck me: she was "passionate about authenticity and congruency and alignment." She knew deep down that she wasn't living her best life, even though she appeared successful.
I think this hunger for authenticity is actually a hunger for God, even when people don't recognize it as such.
We were created for authentic connection with our Creator. We were designed to live in alignment with His nature, in congruency with His truth, with our internal reality matching our external presentation.
When we don't have that—when we're disconnected from God, living out of alignment with His design, presenting one image while dying inside—we feel it. Something is fundamentally wrong. We're not living our best life, no matter how successful we appear.
And no amount of spiritual seeking can fix it if we're not actually connecting with the One we were created to know.
Augustine said it perfectly: "You have made us for Yourself, O Lord, and our hearts are restless until they rest in You."
We can seek peace in meditation, enlightenment in eastern philosophy, alignment in yoga, meaning in self-help books. But until we find our rest in God Himself—in personal relationship with Him through Jesus Christ—our hearts will remain restless.
Connection Should Change Everything
Here's what Robia understood even before she became a Christian: "If I could connect with God in a real way, it should be able to affect some of these areas in my life, right? I should have some peace."
She was absolutely right.
Real connection with God should affect every area of your life. It should bring peace where there was anxiety. Freedom where there was bondage. Healing where there was brokenness. Transformation where there was stagnation.
If you believe in God but your life looks exactly the same as someone who doesn't—if you're just as anxious, just as tormented, just as bound to counterfeit comforts, just as lacking in peace—something is missing.
You might have religion without relationship. Belief without connection. Spirituality without Christianity.
Jesus said, "I have come that they may have life, and that they may have it more abundantly" (John 10:10, NKJV). Abundant life. Not just existence, not just getting by, not just maintaining appearances while dying inside—abundant life.
That abundant life comes from knowing Him, not just knowing about Him.
The Evidence of Real Connection
So how do you know if you've moved from seeking God to knowing God? How can you tell if you have religion or relationship?
Here's the evidence of real connection with God:
Peace. Not the absence of problems, but a deep settledness in your soul even in the midst of storms. "The peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus" (Philippians 4:7, NKJV).
Transformation. Your life actually changes. Old patterns break. Bondages lose their power. You're becoming more like Christ. "Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new" (2 Corinthians 5:17, NKJV).
Freedom. The things that once held you captive no longer have the same grip. "Therefore if the Son makes you free, you shall be free indeed" (John 8:36, NKJV).
Love. You actually love God, not just believe in Him. And that love naturally flows out to others. "We love Him because He first loved us" (1 John 4:19, NKJV).
Communion. You experience two-way communication with God through Holy Spirit. You hear His voice, sense His presence, know His heart. "My sheep hear My voice, and I know them, and they follow Me" (John 10:27, NKJV).
If these things are missing—if you believe in God but have no peace, no transformation, no freedom, no love, no real communion—then you might still be seeking without having found. You might have religion without relationship.
Moving from Belief to Relationship
So how do you move from believing in God to actually knowing Him?
It starts with Jesus.
Jesus said, "I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Me" (John 14:6, NKJV). He's not just a good teacher, a wise philosopher, or a spiritual guide among many options. He's the way—the only way—to relationship with God.
You can't know the Father without going through the Son. You can't have relationship with God while bypassing Jesus. He's the door, the bridge, the connection point.
This means you have to do more than just acknowledge Jesus' existence or admire His teachings. You have to actually come to Him, surrender to Him, receive Him.
John 1:12 says, "But as many as received Him, to them He gave the right to become children of God, to those who believe in His name" (NKJV).
Receiving Jesus means:
Acknowledging that you need Him
Believing that He died for your sins and rose from the dead
Surrendering your life to Him
Inviting Him to be Lord of your life, not just a spiritual concept you believe in
Opening yourself to relationship with Holy Spirit
This isn't about joining a religion, following rules, or cleaning yourself up first. It's about coming to Jesus exactly as you are and letting Him transform you from the inside out.
It's about moving from belief to belonging, from seeking to finding, from religion to relationship.
The Invitation Still Stands
Robia spent years seeking—having faith, having a spiritual life, believing in God—before she actually came to know Him personally. And when she did, everything changed.
Not all at once. Not magically. But really, truly, powerfully changed.
The torment lifted. The bondage broke. The peace came. And now she helps others experience the same transformation she found.
That's what knowing God does. It changes everything.
So here's my question for you: Do you know God, or do you just know about Him?
Do you have a relationship with Jesus, or just respect for His teachings?
Are you experiencing the peace, transformation, freedom, love, and communion that come from real connection with God? Or are you still seeking, still searching, still spiritual but not yet Christian?
If you're still seeking, I have good news: you can find Him. In fact, He's already seeking you.
Jesus said, "For the Son of Man has come to seek and to save that which was lost" (Luke 19:10, NKJV).
He's pursuing you right now. He wants relationship with you. He's inviting you to move from belief to connection, from religion to relationship, from seeking to knowing.
All you have to do is respond to His invitation.
Come to Jesus. Not to a religious system, not to a set of rules, not to a spiritual philosophy—come to Him. Surrender to Him. Receive Him. Let Him bring you into relationship with the Father through Holy Spirit.
That's where seeking ends and knowing begins.
That's where torment gives way to peace.
That's where your spiritual life becomes an actual, transforming relationship with the living God.
He's waiting for you. Not with judgment, not with demands that you clean yourself up first, not with a list of religious requirements you have to meet.
He's waiting with open arms, ready to bring you into the relationship you were created for—the one your heart has been restless for all along.
Stop seeking. Start knowing.
The difference will change everything.
Blessings,
Susan 😊