The Great Deception: How 'Biblical' Gender Roles Actually Violate Scripture
A friend once told me, "Susan, you're a troublemaker." She was referring to my books and teachings about gender roles in the church and home. I had to laugh because she's absolutely right—I am a troublemaker. But sometimes the truth is troublesome, especially when it challenges deeply held beliefs that have been passed down for generations.
The real trouble isn't with what I'm teaching—it's with what we've been taught. For centuries, the church has built elaborate theological structures around a handful of Scripture passages, creating "biblical" gender roles that actually violate the very heart of Scripture itself.
The Usual Suspects
Let me walk you through the passages that are typically used to silence women and establish male authority:
1 Corinthians 14 - The "shush of women" passage
1 Corinthians 11 - The headship passage
1 Timothy 2-3 - "We don't permit women to teach" and "Only men can be elders"
Ephesians 5 - "Wives, submit to your husbands"
Genesis 1-2 - The helper passages
These are the scriptural heavy hitters that have been used to create what I call "biblical" gender roles (yes, those are intentional quotation marks). But here's what's troubling: when you dig deeper into these passages—when you study them in their original context, understand their cultural setting, and examine what they actually say in the original languages—a very different picture emerges.
The Law of Love Test
Here's a simple test I like to apply to any interpretation of Scripture: Does this violate the law of love?
Paul tells us in 1 Corinthians 13 that love "does not demand its own way" (NLT). Love "is not boastful" and "does not insist on its own way" (ESV). Yet how many marriages have been built on the foundation that the man gets his way because he's "the head"? How many families operate under the assumption that male authority is God's design?
Wait a minute. That violates the law of love right there in 1 Corinthians 13.
When we have to work too hard to make Scripture fit our predetermined conclusions, when we have to twist and manipulate passages to support hierarchical structures, chances are something's wrong with our interpretation—not with God's Word.
The Real Troublemaker
The enemy of our souls is the real troublemaker here. He's the one who has systematically worked to disempower God's people by creating false divisions between men and women. He's the one who benefits when families are torn apart by power struggles disguised as "biblical order."
Think about it: What would happen if men and women actually functioned as the unified team God designed them to be? What would happen if the church embraced the full gifting of both men and women? What would happen if families operated in true partnership rather than hierarchy?
The world would be transformed. The enemy knows this, which is why he's worked so hard to convince us that God's design is actually a pyramid with men at the top and women supporting from below.
The Genesis Revelation
But let's go back to the very beginning. In Genesis 1:26-28, God says, "Let us make mankind in our image, in our likeness, so that they may rule..." (NIV). Notice the plural pronouns: "Let us make mankind... so that THEY may rule."
From the very beginning, before sin entered the world, God's design was for both men and women to rule together. They were both created in the image of God—a God who exists in perfect unity as Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. No hierarchy in the Trinity, no chain of command, just perfect love and unity.
The word "Adam" in Hebrew means "mankind"—it's not even specifically male until after the woman is drawn out and there are two present. The original design was unity, partnership, and shared dominion.
The Translation Trap
Here's where it gets really troubling: many of our English translations have been filtered through the cultural biases of their translators. Take Phoebe in Romans 16:1-2, for example. The same Greek word (diakonos) is used 20 times in the New Testament. Nineteen times it's translated as "deacon" or "minister." But for Phoebe? It's translated as "servant."
Why? Because the translators couldn't conceive of a woman in church leadership, so they translated the word differently for her than they did for men. This isn't conspiracy theory—it's documented translation bias that has shaped our understanding of women's roles for centuries.
Paul: The Original Feminist
The apostle Paul—who has been painted as the enemy of women—was actually their strongest advocate in the first century. When you read his letters in their cultural context, you see him consistently elevating women, partnering with them in ministry, and defending their right to participate fully in church life.
In 1 Corinthians 11, when Paul addresses the order of creation argument (the same one still used today), he brilliantly responds: "Nevertheless, in the Lord woman is not independent of man, nor is man independent of woman. For as woman came from man, so also man is born of woman. But everything comes from God" (1 Corinthians 11:11-12, NIV).
Paul's point? Stop trying to establish hierarchy based on creation order. You're mutually dependent. Both of you come from God.
The Kingdom Alternative
Here's what I've discovered: God's Kingdom operates on completely different principles than the world's systems. In the world, power flows downward, authority means control, and someone has to be in charge. But in God's Kingdom:
Power flows in all directions
Authority means responsibility to serve
Leadership means lifting others up
Success means everyone flourishing together
This isn't about rejecting order or structure—it's about embracing God's order instead of the world's counterfeit version.
The Fruit Test
Jesus said, "By their fruit you will recognize them" (Matthew 7:16, NIV). So let's apply the fruit test to traditional gender roles:
Do they produce unity or division?
Do they create freedom or bondage?
Do they result in flourishing relationships or power struggles?
Do they reflect the heart of God or the systems of the world?
Everywhere I look, I see families torn apart by trying to live according to religious formulas rather than the Spirit of God. I see women who've been told they can't lead, can't teach, can't fully use their gifts—and then we wonder why half the church is operating at half-capacity.
I see men who've been burdened with expectations they were never meant to carry, trying to be something they're not, withdrawing from relationships because they can't measure up to impossible standards of "biblical manhood."
The Truth That Sets Free
The truth is this: God created men and women as equal partners in His image, designed to rule together in unity and love. Sin introduced hierarchy and power struggles, but Christ came to restore God's original design.
When Jesus said, "My kingdom is not of this world" (John 18:36, NIV), He wasn't just talking about geography—He was introducing a completely different way of relating to one another.
Am I a troublemaker? Absolutely. But I'm in good company. Jesus was called a troublemaker too. He troubled the religious establishment by treating women as equals, by challenging power structures, by showing us what God's Kingdom really looks like.
The question isn't whether we're going to cause trouble—it's whether we're going to cause the right kind of trouble. The kind that sets people free. The kind that restores relationships. The kind that unleashes the full power of God's Kingdom on earth.
That's the kind of troublemaker I want to be.
What's your experience with traditional gender roles? Have you seen the fruit of hierarchy in relationships, or have you experienced the freedom of true partnership? I'd love to hear your thoughts.
Blessings,
Susan 😊